DIARY of a TEEN FUCK-TOY
Chapter 13
Lost Love
(Mf, M+f, reluc, oral)

by Art Martin

Doing what she did best

Pursuant to the Berne Convention, this work is copyrighted 2009 with all rights expressly reserved by its author unless explicitly granted.



Standard Disclaimer: This story contains sexually graphic and explicit material and as such it is not suitable for minors. If you are a minor, please leave now as it is illegal for you to be here. If it is illegal for you to read or view sexually explicit material in the community you view such material, please leave now. This story and characters are purely fictional and any resemblance to events or persons (living or dead) is purely coincidental. If you are offended by sexually explicit stories, please read no further. If you are offended by stories featuring group sex, bisexual situations, incest, sex between minors and adults, or any other situation, please check the story code before reading the text. These stories are just that, stories, and do not promote or condone the activities described herein, especially when it comes to unsafe sexual practices or sex between adults and minors.



READ CHAPTER 1




Early Summer, 1967


Thursday, June 8, 1967

Not only am I a wicked person, I am a coward to boot!  I feel asleep clutching a bottle of Mama’s happy pills.  It would have been easiest if I had just swallowed them all and then I wouldn’t have to face myself ever again. I’m sure Mama would be happy again with me gone and maybe she could give to Joan and Pepper the love and attention that they deserve. All the unhappiness of these past months and years are all my fault.  The three of them don’t deserve any of this!

But then I think of Jimmy.  Wonderful, generous, loving, Jimmy.  If anyone loves me it’s Jimmy, but I don’t think he does either.  Pops?  Pops is sweet and Pops gets what he wants, but Pops doesn’t love me.  He loves me naked.  He loves me to suck his cock, he loves doing me up the ass, and doing all his friends, but he doesn’t love me.  No one loves me.  Except maybe Pepper.  But Pepper doesn’t understand the harm I’ve caused her and when she does, she’ll hate me too.   

*****

Mama got home a few hours ago and when she went into her room, she went crazy!  I didn’t get thanked for cleaning the house; I had my face slapped for violating her privacy and was told in no uncertain terms that I was to never set foot in her room ever again.  I guess I got what I deserved, but poor Joan and Pepper.  They were shocked at how Mama treated me.

Once Mama went upstairs and shut herself in for the night (it was still mid-afternoon), Joan came to me and wanted to know just what was it between Mama and me.  She didn’t know and I wouldn’t tell her.  Finally she got angry and lashed out at me too.  She didn’t know why, but she was certain that I was at the root cause of everything.  She is so right!

I think that maybe I’d better leave.  It would be best for everyone.  I’m sure Pops would give me a bed to sleep in… his and just maybe I could patch things up with Jimmy.  Hmmm, maybe if I just let Jimmy knock me up… But would he marry me?  What of Pops then?

Married?   Me married?  Married to Terri?  First it was Dad and now Terri?  She wanted to marry me?  Why didn’t she say something?  We could have at least talked about it and talked with Dad about it.  Yeah, we could have talked with Dad, and I’m pretty certain what he would have said after busting his nut in her.    No doubt he would have probably been able to convince me that a slut wife was the best thing ever.  Even after Dad had suggested it himself, I dismissed the idea.  It never really crossed my mind.  Why would it?  Marry a slut like her?  Only now in my old age do I realize what fun I missed out on, but the whole concept and the advantages of an open marriage went right over my head even though I knew that was exactly what my Dad had wanted with Mom.  Hell, if nothing else, I could have talked her into going to LSU with me. 

Friday, June 9, 1967

I had an awful dream last.   Something was crawling around inside me, and it kept getting bigger and bigger.  Mama and Joan were there telling me what a dirty slut I was and that I got what I deserved.  It got so big that I could hardly move and Joan and Mama just laughed at me.  It was Jax’s baby! I was lying in bed alone, watching as my bloated stomach seemed to boil.  Then it came, right through my stomach!  It was a hideous!  Whatever it was it wasn’t human and it had ripped me open to get out!  It tired to scream, but I couldn’t make a sound.  The thing crawled up and begin feeding on my breast, not milking it, eating it!  Thank God I woke up!

I was soaked in sweat and couldn’t get back to sleep after that.  I didn’t want the dream to return.  Then I realized it wasn’t a dream, something was crawling around inside me!  I didn’t think you could feel anything this early, but I felt something.  God help me.  I know it was all in my head, but… I must have fallen back to sleep after exhausting myself crying.

I know it’s silly as all that devil stuff was just Luther and Sadie role playing and “getting into their art”.  They sure had me fooled.  I’m just thankful they weren’t so whacked out that they actually made a human sacrifice out of me “for the sake of art”!  Poor Julian, I don’t think he’ll ever get over it.  

I woke up again around dawn and decided I needed coffee.  While drinking my coffee I thought of a book Daddy had given me years ago about plantation life.  Whenever the young slave girls would menstruate, the foreman would make a note of it.  Then exactly two weeks later, the girl would be brought to a barn where Millie’s father and her brothers would judge her fitness.  If she was pretty enough, she was fucked by the foreman and any other white men who wanted some "pontang" in the hopes of producing a pretty mulatto girl to be "used" as a house girl.  If she was simply sturdy breeding stock, they would bring Jobo in.  Millie’s father would tell him, “Breed her.”  Then he and his sons would drink whiskey and watch as Jobo fucked the girl. 

“Breed her!”  That was what Luther told Jax to do with me! Then he and his wife watched Jax fuck me.  How could they do that to me? What did that have to do with art? Okay, I was “bought and paid for” as Luther put it, but he didn’t own me!  And now…. Now I might be carrying Jax’s bastard!  How can I ever live this down?  Then I thought of something Daddy had said long ago about fixing me up if I got pregnant by him.  I could call Jenny!  She would know a doctor who would do it.  But if I did that, she’d want something in return, mainly me!  Still if I have to, I'll do it.  God help me, but I’ll have it cut out of me!  I just can’t let anyone know about it though.  It would be my and Jenny’s secret.

Having developed a plan to deal with my "problem” I thought about my other problem… what to do with myself.   What do I really want?   After thinking about that all morning, I decided that I knew.  I want Jimmy.  I want Jimmy to love me again.  Is that too much to ask?  


Sat., June 10, 1967

After deciding to waylay Jimmy yesterday, I dressed in my bellbottoms and a peasant blouse with no bra.  My plan was to just show up at Jimmy’s and just move in.  He always liked it when I went without a bra.  For one thing he really has trouble with the hooks.  I’ve never seen a guy so inept with removing a bra as Jimmy is.  Pops on the other hand… I get within arm’s reach of that man and WHOOOSH! My bra is flying off!  Maybe I should get Pops to give Jimmy some fatherly lessons…

Anyway, I headed out.  Joan had my car so I just walked, planning to greet Jimmy when he got home from work.  Date or not, I know he wouldn’t just kick me out his of bed without getting a little and I needed some loving in the worst way.  At least enough to hold me over until Pops got home.

I was walking down the street when Nick Melancon comes bouncing out of his house and cutting me off on the sidewalk.  I hadn’t seen Nick since he went to Hammond for college last fall.  I hadn’t missed the SOB in the least and wasn’t particularly thrilled to see him again.

“Where y’at, Dawling?” he greeted with a predator’s smile as his eyes crawled over my body. “Damn, if ya ain’t comfort for my po’ eyes!  How ya been, Cher?”

“Fine, Nick,” I answered as dispassionately as possible, all the while looking about for a carload of his friends to appear with rape on their minds.

“Say, how’s yer po’ mama doin’?  I hear she’s been real sick.”

“She’s better, thank you.”

“I only acks because my Ma’mer was acksing me and acksing if I’d seen ya and all dat.  Say, could ya do me a favor and go say hi to Ma’mer?  She’s really been worried about y’all.”

“I can’t right now, Nick.  I’m…”

“It’d only take a minute,” he said pointing to the Melancon house.

“I can’t, I…”

“I ain’t lettin’ ya go without saying hello to Ma’mer.  Please?  I know ya don’ like me, but for my Ma’mer.  She’s been truly  worried ‘bout ya folks… It’d only take a minute.”

As despicable as Nick is, his mom is an angel.  After Daddy died, she had brought food to the house for months and months.  I hadn’t seen or talked to her in a long time and I felt the need to be courteous toward her.  “Okay, Nick, but only for a minute.”  HA!  I can be soooo stupid sometimes!

As the front door closed behind us, Nick called out, “Ma’mer!  Ma’mer!”  There was no answer.  Nick turns to me and says, “Oh, yeah, I forgot.  She’s not here.  Ma’mer and Pa done gone ta Mamou for a few days to see my poor old granma’mer.”

I went for the door but Nick simply pushed me up against the door and locked it.  “Now I gots the house all to myself fo’ tree days.  Wha’cha say we that make good use of dat time, Cher?”

“Are you going to rape me?” I asked trying to control my panic.

“Ah ain’t gonna rape ya, cher. But… Ah am gonna fuck ya.  Ya wan’ it, and ah wan’ it.  Ah ain’t gonna do nuthin’ dat ya don’ wan’ me to do.”

“I need to go, Nick.”

“Not till I gets a gets a little.” 

“Are you going to invite your friends?” I said angrily.

“Is dat whats ya wan?”  I didn’t answer him.

He took my hand and placed inside his open zipper… just when he had opened his fly is beyond me, but he was open and he wasn’t wearing any underwear.  “That’s it, Cher.  Wrap those fingers ‘round mah big ole dick.  Ooo yeah, cher!”  While he held my hand on his stiff cock, his other hand slid up my sides and under my blouse.  Grasping my bare tit he said, “Bet ya don’ have no panties on either.”

“Yes, I do,” I replied, my resolve evaporating as my nipples spoke to my cunt and I felt myself becoming wet.

“Well, not fo’ long, Blondie,” he chucked rolling my nipple between his fingers.

“Damn you,” I managed, but the SOB was right.  I wasn’t going to be wearing panties for very long, not the way I was feeling.

Nick removed his hand from mine as I was now playing with his dick.  Next thing I knew, my top was being pulled over my head and his jeans were down around his knees.  His hands went to my shoulders and he pressed down gently.  My knees automatically responded and I let him guide me down until I was face to face with his cock.

It struck me then that I’d never really seen his cock before.  It’d been inside me any number of times, but it was always dark, or I was being held down and fighting, and I really never saw it.  There was plenty of light this time and I was surprised to say the least.  I’d only seen one dick like this before, dark but with a lighter colored head and that was Jax’s dick.  Even though they had no Negro features other than maybe a permanent tan, I surmised then that the Melancons were mulattos!  Cajun mulattos.

Mulatto or not, I took him between my lips and into my mouth, determined to give him the best blow job possible.  Nick was right, he didn’t have to rape me.  I spent the night with him and we screwed and screwed and screwed until he had to get up and go to work the next morning. 

“Ya kin stay if ya want,” he said as he got dressed, “but dis afternoon… Ah wants ya here when Ah gets here and… Ah wan’cha neked.  Understand?” 

So here I am, ready to go to Nick’s and be a whore for him.  He’s not Jimmy, not by a long shot, but he’s not like that Rick fellow I screwed the night before either.  Nick’s not really such a bad sort, he’s just demanding.  He’s demanding, but he gave me exactly what I needed yesterday and he’ll give me exactly what I need tonight. God, I am such a total slut!

I think it was this weekend, but with nothing much better to do than hang around all weekend and play with myself, I headed over to Biloxi to carouse with my Uncle Tee.  He was happy to have me and we went fishing in the bay for speckled trout.  Saturday night, we hung out at his bar, the Back Bay Club.  The place never changes; same dilapidated décor, same one-legged barkeep, same customers, and the same card games.  The only things new were the barmaids, they were younger, but they still stripped when the tip jar got full and they still put out for a few bucks in the back room.  Uncle Tee treated me to a BJ on the house, but told me that if wanted a fuck, I’d have to pay for that myself.  I settled for the free blowjob.

Sunday, June 11, 1967

I hate Nick!  I really hate him.  I hate him because he brings out the worst in me.  Yesterday, I was waiting for him, naked like he wanted me.  Within a minute of getting home from his job doing whatever in an oil field, and before even showering the grime off, he was pumping into me.  I really don’t mind a sweaty man, or rather a man who smells of sweat, it’s so primal and adds something carnally to the experience, but the smell of grease and oil was too much.

After he fucked me, he took his shower.  I joined him and he really liked that even though the tub shower was rather crowded.  Then he took me back to his bed and screwed me again.  It was a long fuck, and as he worked his colorful cock in my pussy I heard some noise, then voices.  Soon there were several guys in the doorway, watching us fuck. Nick rolled off and greeted his buddies.  I’d never seen any of them before and Nick explained that they were fraternity brothers of his.  I protested, but Nick says, “Ya wanted me ta get some guys and ah gots some guys fo’ ya.”

“I didn’t say that!”

“Well dey’s here now an ah ain’t gonna disappoint dem.”

“You expect me to…”  I didn’t need an answer to that and I didn’t get one.  Of course he expected me to.  I told him, “No!  I won’t do it!” Nick just hauled me up and dragged me into the living room.  He told me to “cut da play actin’ and get down on da flo.”

There was some discussion as to who would do me first and it was settled by cutting a deck of cards. A part of me wanted to run and a part of me wanted to stay.  Besides, what was I supposed to do? Run home naked? I didn’t want to be gang raped, (gang fucked, yes, but gang raped, no) and decided to take charge of the imminent group fuck. 

I told the winner of card cutting to sit on the sofa.  I played with his cock for a minute to be sure that he was fully hard and then straddled him.  Sinking down on his dick, I fed him my tit while I gave him a fucking to remember.

I had the second guy sit on the sofa too.  I guess he thought he would get a ride like the first, but instead, I knelt between his legs and gave him a dick sucking.  While doing this I felt hands on my hips and then felt the next cock slide into me.  So much for me taking charge.  After that it was a free for all, and I was fucked until the guys couldn’t get it up anymore.  They all left around midnight.

Even though I did enjoy it, I hate Nick for making me do it.  He should have asked.  I might have said no, but I might have said yes.  As it was, I didn’t have any say in the matter.  I was to be used and that was that.  He wants me back tonight, but I have news for him!

Monday, June 12, 1967

I didn’t go over to Nick’s last night.  He came over here!  Joan had a date and Pepper was sleeping over with a girlfriend, leaving me alone with Mama.  Mama, of course, was locked away upstairs, conscious or unconscious, I don’t know which, she didn’t want anything to do with me and she was gone for the duration.

I told Nick that I didn’t want to see him, but he more or less forced his way in.  “It’s a good thang ya didn’t come over to fuck today,” he snickered.  “Ma’mer and Pa came home a day early.  Ma’mer woulda had a heart attack to find ya neked in my bed,” he laughed.  He looked around and asked if my sisters were home. 

“Joan’s up in her room,” I replied.

“No, she ain’t!  Ah saw her bein’ picked up by her boyfriend.  So…. where’s ya mama?  She out cold like always?”

“How do you know that?”

“That little sister of yours, da lil’ blonde cutie… she tells me all sorts of things.  Is she here?”

“No, she’s not,” I replied as icily as possible.

“Dat’s too bad.  Bet dat one’s as much fun as you are, Cher.”  I felt the hairs standing up on the back of neck with that comment.

“You leave her alone,” I said evenly but ready to claw his goddamed eyes out.

“Ah will, dawlin’…dat is if Ah’m gettin’ whats Ah wants from ya.”

“What do you want, Nick?”

“Ya know what Ah wants.  It’s wha’ ya wants too.”  Not only is he ignorant and uncouth, he’s arrogant!  “Seeing dat yer mama is knocked out fer da night, what’cha say we get ta doin’ whats we’s gonna do?”

I really didn’t have much choice but to take him to my room and give him what he wanted.  Thankfully he left before Joan came home.  She came in and heard me crying and actually came in to see what was the matter.  I couldn’t tell her the truth, but I did thank her for her concern.

This was also about the time that I discovered that one of the girls from the prom (one of those girls that I wanted to follow up with) was a real jewel.  Mary Ann… nice girl, very nice.  She was a dark haired beauty who was pretty drunk at the prom and let me hump her on the dance floor.  When I asked her out, she said ‘yes’.  To me this was particularly delicious, not just because Mary Ann was a babe, but her “boyfriend” was one of the guys who liked to brag about and goad me with his whoring adventures with Terri.  Mike was a first class jerk and to steal away his girlfriend was high on my priorities.  Mike was a rather self-centered and possessive fellow, so when she said ‘yes’ to going out with me, I was ecstatic.

I picked her up and took her uptown to the Ye Olde College Inn for a burger and onion rings, then to one of my favorite haunts, the Red Lion.  This was a college bar and beer, beer by the pitcher, was the drink of choice, served in glass mugs emblazoned with the Red Lion logo (until all those mugs were stolen).  

When we arrived I saw one of my buddies who lived in the uptown area, playing pinball.  It wasn’t a surprise to find him here as we had talked about getting together earlier that afternoon.  Bill was a master at pinball and he was well on his way to making enough money to pay his and my bar bill that night.  These pinball machines didn’t have flippers or stupid space alien logos on them, they were gambling devices owned and operated by Tacca Amusement. Every bar in New Orleans had Tacca operated cigarette machines, jukeboxes and pinball machines… they had too.   Tacca was one of the “Little Man’s” semi-legitimate businesses, the “Little Man” being Carlos Marcelo, Don of the Mafia in New Orleans.  A bar without Tacca machines wasn’t in business very long.

The pinball machines had twenty five holes arranged in a square.  By pumping quarters into the machine for a single game, you could change the numbers assigned to the various holes and thus increase your odds of winning.  It wasn’t at all uncommon for Bill to pump two, three dollars a pop into one of these things.  Each game was played with five balls; the balls were launched with a spring loaded device like you’d see on any pinball machines.  To control the ball, you bumped the machine with the heel of your hand, sending the steel ball off in the direction you wished.  Bump too hard and the machine would ‘tilt’… game over and Tacca was richer by two, three dollars. 

Like I said, Bill was a master and when he played, he had a crowd of envious wannabees watching.  He made it look so easy.  After thirty minutes or so, he’d cash in and the wannabees would try to match his techniques.  Winning as much as Bill did, he also generated a lot of profit for Tacca from the hapless wannabees.

Mary Ann was fascinated by what Bill was doing, and not just the subtle wrist actions to control the ball, but all the motions up on the odds board associated with changing the odds.  He really put on quite a show.  When Bill cashed in, I secured us a table in the back room and the four of us (Bill had a date too) sat down to the first of god knows how many pitchers of beer, compliments of Bill. 

Another thing about the Red Lion during that time, was that for every five-song set played on the jukebox (Tacca owned of course), two of the songs would inevitably be “Scotch and Soda” and “Let’s Spend the Night Together” by the Rolling Stones.  These two songs were played over and over and they were the sing-along songs of the joint.  “Let’s spend the Night Together” was a pretty famous song, but “Scotch and Soda”, I don’t think I’ve ever heard it played anywhere else but in the Red Lion.

Somewhere along the way, Bill got the bright idea (preplanned) that we should be drinking Boiler Makers, that is, adding a shot of whiskey to a mug of beer.  Deadly drink for sure and guaranteed to get you plastered.  We all had one and it had its intended effect on our dates. Everything was going to plan and when Bill suggested that we go over to his house, Mary Ann was giddily agreeable.

Of course Mary Ann didn’t know that Bill’s parents were out of town, nor did she know that my goal that evening was to get into her pants, no matter what.

We had another drink at Bill’s and with the girls drunk and vulnerable, it was time to take advantage of them.  Bill showed us a spare bedroom and Mary Ann went along with it.  Soon I had her motor running on high speed.  She never objected to anything I did and that included getting naked.  Soon I was poised to do the act.  Mary Ann was looking straight up at me with huge eyes.  My cock pressed into her labia and soon my cock head was surrounded with the wet moisture from the maw of her vagina.  Slowly I slid into her (god, she was tight!) and as I did her eyes got bigger and bigger.  Then I stopped.  Not because I wanted to, but because her hymen had stopped me.  It confused me at first because I never imagined that she was a virgin!  I hadn’t had a virgin since I fucked my cousin Linda during the Cuban Missile Crisis! She was a virgin?  How was I to know? 

I gathered my wits and pushed through.  Mary Ann gasped and she winced.  The deed was done, the virgin was deflowered.  With my dick mashed up against her cervix I paused and waited for the grimace to fade from her face.  It did and I began to move, fucking this sweet girl because I wanted to get at her “boyfriend”.  What a heel!  I was worse than Mike was, or so I thought.  Up to that moment, Mary Ann had been just a piece of meat to be used for my “revenge”, but as stroked in and out of her virginal canal, my whole outlook changed; I saw her for who she really was, a sweet, sweet Catholic girl who never imagined that I would deliberately get her drunk, just so that I could fuck her and get back at some jerk that she gone to the prom with.  She wasn’t Mike’s girlfriend!  She was just a girl, a sweet, sweet girl and I was ravishing her.  I did have the decency to pull out when I came, knowing that she was totally unprotected.

When I had finished, she was sober enough to tell me, “I think you’d better take me home.”   We got dressed.  There wasn’t much I could do about the bloody mess on Bill’s mother’s guest room bedspread, so I left it to deal with tomorrow.  Poor Bill, he really freaked out when he saw that!

We rode home in silence, with me feeling a curious mixture of pride and self-loathing.  She didn’t give me goodnight kiss before she slipped inside.  I could only imagine what was going through her mind.

Next day I got an earful from Bill and agreed to pay the dry cleaning bill for the soiled bedspread.  Later, I called Mary Ann.   I was surprised when she took my call.  She was very guarded, but I asked her if wanted to go get a hamburger at Bud’s Broiler over by City Park.  To my surprise, she said ‘yes’.  

Strolling among the huge live oaks at City Park, I didn’t actually apologize, but I did my best to reassure her that I thought she was wonderful and all that.  Turns out that she was afraid that I thought she was a slut or worse.  Actually, going out with Mike, I did think she was a slut, but that was before I realized I knew nothing about her. I asked her about Mike and she told me that they had gone out a few times, but that was all.   He was hardly her ‘steady’ boyfriend, in fact, she didn’t want to date him ever again.  I really didn’t feel bad about what I’d done, but I sure felt badly about my motivations. 

We stopped by a moss covered ancient giant, one with a low branch that touched the ground.  By and by we were smooching.  By and by my wandering hands wandered as they pleased and I felt her up.  Again she never told me to stop.  Hell, if it had been more private, I think I could have fucked her again.  On our next date, I did just that.  She enjoyed making love and enjoyed me making love to her.  She was a great summer-time girlfriend.  Like I said, she was a sweet, sweet girl. 

Our attraction, however, was more lust driven than love driven and when the summer was over, so was our relationship.  Thinking back upon it, she was ready to be popped and I was the lucky guy that popped her first.  I guess I did a good job and she really enjoyed having sex with me.  She wasn’t insatiable, but she was enthusiastic about sex.  Over the years, I’m sure she made a lot of guys happy at USL.                      

As for Nick Melancon, I hadn’t seen him since he went to Southeastern in Hammond last fall, and I was happy to keep it that way.  That Terri was being targeted by him again was something I was totally unaware of.  Perhaps if I had called her and talked to her, she would have told me, but I didn’t, my attention was on despoiling Mary Ann.

Tues., June 13, 1967

That brazen bastard!  He came over again to screw me, only this time Joan and Pepper were home. That didn’t stop him!  Once they were out of sight, he grabbed me by the arm and took me to my bedroom.  I don’t know who, but someone opened the door, looked inside and then closed the door.  Nick was doing me doggie style, on the floor and in front of the mirror like Daddy liked to do it.  I know they saw us.  How could they not see us?  The only good thing was that Nick didn’t stay very long.  Needed his sleep before working all day.  Poor baby!  Maybe he’ll have an industrial accident! 

Wednesday, June 14, 1967

It was Joan who saw us last night.  She came up to me this morning, out of earshot of Mama and Pepper, and said, “You are such a slut, Terri.  Can’t you at least go out and do it with that creep in a car somewhere?  You bring him into this house to have sex again and I’ll tell Mama what you’ve been doing.”  So much for sisterly love and understanding.  She’d like nothing better than have Mama kick me out for good, just so that she could have my bedroom!  I just need to leave and the sooner the better for everybody. 

I won’t give him another chance to use and humiliate me like that.  I’ll go see Jimmy this afternoon before Nick gets home. Jimmy won’t ask too many questions and then I’ll talk to Pops when he gets in later.  I’m sure I’ll have a safe place to sleep from now on.

Friday, June 16, 1967

I shouldn’t have gone the other night to Jimmy’s.  It’s all my fault.  I should have been here, letting Nick have his way with me, but I wasn’t…. I was at Jimmy’s and I was happy.  Happily having sex with the one person I enjoy having sex with the most, Jimmy.

Jimmy was real happy to see me and even took me out for a poorboy.  Then we got after it, like we always get after it.  It was fun, it was loving and I felt soooo good with his dick up inside me where it belongs.  We had been at it for several hours, spooning on the sofa, watching the Carol Burnett Show.  Jimmy was behind me, slowly moving to keep hard, but not enough for him to orgasm…. He left the orgasms to me, and I was cruising along in of one of those prolonged periods where I had many, many little orgasms, one right after the other.  Carol Burnett was over and some other show was on, but Jimmy just kept me and himself riding along the edge until Pops came home from work. 

I needed to talk to Pops in the worst way, but he had someone with him.  “Well, look who’s here!” he said jovially.  “My favorite teen wet dream!”  He then turned to his date and told her, “This is my son and his girlfriend.  Isn’t she beautiful! You want to watch them or should we send them off to bed?”  The young woman was clearly embarrassed, not only for herself but for me as well. 

Pops then turned to us and told us, “Take it to the bedroom, kids.”  Being good boys and girls, Jimmy and I moved into his bedroom and shut the door.  I know Pops’ date stayed, because we heard her howling a little later on. 

I went home around mid-morning without talking to Pops as the woman was still there in bed with him.  I decided that I’d just call Pops at work later in the day and lay it all on the line. 

Neither Joan nor Pepper were home when I first got there; they were out doing something in my car.  Mama was there drinking her coffee.  She was her usual friendly self to me.  She had to know that I had shacked up last night, but she didn’t say anything… literally, she didn’t say anything to me, she just acted like I wasn’t even there.

Later in the day, Pepper came to see me in my room.  Almost immediately a tear ran down her cheek.  I asked her what the matter was.

“Yesterday, after you left… Nick came over.”

“Nick?  Nick Melancon?”

“Joan had just gone out on a date and…”

“Joan wasn’t here?”

“No, she wasn’t.  Nick asked to see you and I told him you weren’t here.”  She paused and then quickly said, “He said, 'Dat’s okay, Cher.  I really wanted to see you.'  He’s always been nice to me so when he asked if he could come in, I let him.  We talked for awhile and he told me how he thought I was the prettiest of us and that he really wanted to get to know me. He was so sweet and polite.  First thing I knew he had kissed me.  I kissed him back and one thing led to another and… He fucked me, Terri! He promised he’d pull out, but he didn’t!  He came inside me. I told him I wasn’t protected and he just said, ‘Dats your problem, cher, not mine.’  Then he did me again!  He did me three, maybe four times, and he came inside me!”

I had wondered why my bed was messed up when I got home this morning and now I know.  Nick had fucked my little sister in my bed!  The bastard!

“When is your period due?” I asked her.

“Not for two weeks.  I’m going to get pregnant, Terri.  I know I will.  How could I not get pregnant?”

“Did he force you?”

“No, not really.  Not the first time.  I tried to get him to stop after that, but he wouldn’t.  He just kept doing me over and over again, until he suddenly had enough and went home.  He said he’s coming back tonight, and maybe doing a double header with you and me.  What should I do?”

I wasn’t at all sure what she should do, other than not being here when Nick came to do her. It is one thing to have sex with one guy, but I have no  illusions that that he’d gladly use Pepper like he used me, as place for all his friends to put their cocks.  I couldn’t let that happen… not to Pepper.  But what should I do?  How do I protect her? The only thing I could think of was getting the hell away from the house before Nick showed up with six or ten of his buddies, so I took Pepper with me to Jimmy’s.

 Jimmy was surprised when he got home and found Pepper with me.  I know he was expecting just me, but I couldn’t leave her home to be raped.  Always the gentleman and hopelessly inept in the kitchen, Jimmy took us out to eat. 

When we got back, it was clear that he was uncomfortable.  Maybe uncomfortable is not the right word.  Jimmy’s always been friendly with Pepper and she adores him.  I guess he’d been thinking of sex all day while at work and then when he thinks it’s dick-dipping time, I have my little sister there as a chaperone!  I didn’t dare tell him why I had Pepper with me, as I know he’d done something stupid and either he or Nick would have been hurt… I suspect it would have been Nick, and that would be fine with me, but who knows…. Guys can be such hotheads and those two have never gotten along.   

So we sat, watched TV and made small talk, about the only talk Jimmy’s knows.  I hadn’t called Pops either, and when he came in, thankfully alone, it wasn’t a good time to discuss my problems at home; I had Pepper to worry about.  Pops was in his element, flirting with both me and with Pepper. Sometimes he got a bit racy and caused Pepper to blush.  He loved seeing that! 

I felt it was safe to go home around eleven as Nick needed his sleep before working all day.  I had my car and we drove home.  When we left Pops and Jimmy, I was nowhere nearer a solution to my dilemma than when I first arrived at Jimmy’s.  Suddenly it was all very clear.  I knew what I could do.  I’d fix that bastard.

I sent Pepper up to bed and made a phone call to Jenny, the Madame who ran the escort service I had worked for when Vito was controlling my life. Jenny was really happy to hear from me and immediately wanted to know if I was looking for work.  I told her no, but that I had a problem, a big problem.  She listened and said she could help.  I gave her Nick’s address, what he looked like, what kind of car he drove, when he went to work, when he came home and anything else I knew.  

I asked her about Pepper’s problem and she said that I should take all of my birth control pills and give to them to Pepper all at once. That would prevent a fertilized egg from attaching to the uterus.  She said she had it on good advice that this worked very well, but she couldn’t guarantee anything.

I woke Pepper up and had her swallow a fistful of birth control pills.  I had a fresh pack, so that should do the trick.  I had done all I could do for her and went to bed. 

Sometime during the night, I started my period!  What a relief!  I wasn’t pregnant with Jax’s bastard baby!  I was happy, but Pepper wasn’t out of the woods yet and that tempered my joy.  I guess tomorrow night, at Jimmy’s, it will be oral and anal sex.  I know he won’t mind and Pops sure won’t.  Of course I still have Pepper to worry about.

That was yesterday.  Today, Jenny called me and told me the problem was taken care of and that Pepper would never be bothered by Nick again.  She didn’t elaborate and I didn’t ask.  She then told me that she had a gig for me tonight.  I told her that I really didn’t want to get involved with Vito’s crowd ever again and she told me that I would be working for her, and not some pimp like before.  I told her that I had just started my period, and she accepted that, but she also told me to pack my bags and move in to her house when I’m ready for work.  Again I tried to beg off, but she reminded me that I owed her, that she was short handed and that I’d make a ton of money before college started in the fall. 

When I hung up the phone, I had to cry.  I was to be a working whore again, fucking any dude who had enough money to buy my body for the night.  My dreams of reconciliation with Jimmy are over.  It can never be.  I have cried all day. 

After Terri had showed up at the house for two nights in a row, I wasn’t too surprised to see her the third night.  I figured that whoever she was putting out for had either dumped her or was out of town, why else should she suddenly just show up?  I was especially happy that Pepper wasn’t with her again, not that I minded seeing Pepper.  It was kind of cute seeing the two sisters together with the younger emulating the older.  They had both worn hot pants and showed a good deal of thigh, both wore those stupid platform shoes that were so popular at that time (along with those ghastly polyester leisure suits), and both were wearing their ankle bracelets.  At the time I just thought Pepper was imitating Terri with the anklet, and in a way she was.

That third night Terri explained that it was that time of the month for her.  Was that why she was sulking?  I presumed so.  To me, as long she kept her emotions in check, it was no big deal.  Besides I was and still am a big fan of ass fucking, especially when ass fucking a wanton slut like Terri.  It was always so guttural doing the nasty with her, and she was so totally slutty.  She’d get up on all fours, put her head to ground and reach back and spread open her ass cheeks, winking her anus at me in an invitation to do her.  Damn!  Never been with another girl like her!

Dad too marveled at how lewd she’d get when it came to anal… Dad liked lewd.  He’d really get into it too while getting into her, calling her all sorts of nasty names while he pumped her butt.  Normally he didn’t do that sort of thing, but Terri wanted it and what Terri wanted, Terri got and that was to be treated like the slut she was when ass fucking.

She came over three nights in a row and then disappeared.  At the time I was thankful as I had Mary Ann to contend with, but it was during the workweek, so it was easy to beg off if I needed to, pleading fatigue.  I was fatigued alright, so was Dad, but not from working. 

It wasn’t until two weeks later that I realized that something was amiss.  By then I had heard of Nick Melancon’s misfortune, but didn’t associate it with anything, certainly not Terri.   I disliked the guy and was confident that he’d probably gotten what he deserved, but I didn’t greet the news with any glee.  He was just an old rival who was now totally immaterial to me.

I called and spoke to Pepper.  She said that Terri wasn’t there, but that she’d let her know that I called.  Wasn’t there?  Julian!  She was shacking up with Julian again, or so I thought. 

She did get back to me and when she did I asked her to be upfront with me.  She told me she working for the escort service again.  Prostituting herself… why… just for the fun of it?  I thought she learned her lesson.  Obviously she hadn’t and I just blew her off.  I was getting laid steadily by Mary Ann, so what did I need Terri for?  I sure as hell wasn’t going to pay her!

Friday, June 30, 1967

Jenny was true to her word.  I am making more money than I ever did working for Vito.  The gigs aren’t too bad either.  Jenny’s very particular about  who she sends us out with and they all have been nice to me, lawyers and professional types stepping out for an evening with an attractive  young lady who will not say ‘no’.  Few have been very good in bed, but my enjoyment is secondary.

I finally found out what happened to Nick.  I asked Jenny and she asked if I really wanted to know.  I did and she told me, “I’ve heard some rumors…”  The rumors being that when he woke up to go to work that morning, they were waiting for him.  They being some of Vito’s associates.  They followed him for a while and then they cut him off.  They drove him out to someplace along the Bonneville Spillway, beat him up and set fire to his car.  They didn’t want to kill him, just hurt him and after leaving him to the gators, someone made an anonymous call to the sheriff’s office about a burning car.  They broke a leg, broke an arm and messed his face up real good.  From what I’ve heard, he will have some serious facial scars.  I have a good idea exactly who “they” are as “they” have been getting freebees from me whenever they feel a need. 

Of course I haven’t seen Nick and neither has Pepper, but I talked to Jimmy on the phone and he told me that he’d heard that some guys took Nick for ride and that he  was hurt pretty badly.  He also heard that he was recovering somewhere around Lafayette and had no plans for returning to the New Orleans area anytime soon.  Of course I played dumb and didn’t let on that I was responsible.   Really didn’t want him to be hurt that much, but it serves that bastard right!

Finally around the end of August she called me.  She wanted to go out and see me before she went off to OU and I went off to LSU.  I told Terri that I had a conflict, but maybe I could work something out.  Mary Ann had already gone to USL in Lafayette to participate in the Fall Sorority Rush, so that really wasn’t the problem.  The problem was….  I don’t know...  I was over her? 

I talked to Dad about it and he told me that most likely we’d never see each other again except maybe during Christmas break.   He said that I owed it to her to take her somewhere nice for dinner before she left for Oklahoma. I didn’t owe her anything as far as I was concerned, but I listened to Dad and took her to Commander’s Palace, probably the best restaurant in New Orleans, if not the entire United States.  Dad generously spotted me the cash for the night.

It was a weekday night and I made reservations.  The matrie’d seated us in the main dining room.  Terri suddenly tells the young lady seated at the next table, hello and the two chatted for a moment. Naturally I looked over and there sat a very uncomfortable looking Harold Sterling, the guy my mom was living with.  Harold and I stared at each other while Terri gabbed briefly with her friend.  Naturally Harold was very uncomfortable as he had been caught red-handed out with a hooker and not my mom. I played it cool and pretended not to know him.  Within minutes, Harold paid his tab and rushed out with his “date”.  Later at Dad’s apartment, I asked Terri who the girl was and she told me her name was April and that she was one of Jenny’s girls. 

I didn’t care much for Harold to begin with, but I put up with him for Mom’s sake and was always cordial to him.  I debated whether to tell Mom what I had seen and decided that she needed to know, if she didn’t already know.  At first Mom was angry with me and accused me of trying to sabotage her relationship with Harold.  But I just told her the truth, except I did lie about April… I told Mom that I knew her before she turned pro and that I knew for certain that she was bought for the night.

There was only one entry in her diary between June 30 and our last dinner date.

Tuesday, August 29, 1967

Jenny kept to her word and has let me leave her employ. I made a ton of money being an “escort.  All I had to do was act happy that yet another strange man was fucking me; that and fucking more faceless creeps than I care to remember.  

During this time I haven’t made any journal entries because to keep a diary is strictly against house rules.  Jenny doesn’t want us girls leaving behind a paper trail of who, what, when and she was very strict about it. 

Now that I’m back home and packing to leave, Mama is being particularly nasty towards me, calling me a whore in front of both Joan and Pepper.  I am a whore, but she didn’t need to do that.  When I told her I was taking my car with me to OU, she became unglued, saying that the car wasn’t mine and all that.  Wasn’t mine?  Daddy gave me that car and then I paid for that car… on my back! Oh, the hell with it and the hell with her!  I know how to get another car when I need one.

Jimmy is taking me out to dinner tonight.  That in itself was a big surprise.  I can hardly wait as it will be just like what I’ve doing since the beginning of July!  That’s not fair, but I don’t know what I’m going to say to him.  That I’ll miss him?  He won’t believe that, not for minute, so I guess we’ll just fuck afterwards and leave it at that.  I’m used to that.  Is it too much to hope for that he treats me like he always does, and not like the piece of cheap meat that I am.

The night before Terri left for OU she called.  She wanted to get together and just talk.  She came to my house, but we didn’t talk much.  Dad got home around 9 PM and was very pleased to see her and have a last toss with her too.  Around midnight, we said our goodbyes and promised to keep in touch.  Then she was gone. 

Terri wrote to me several times that fall, but I must admit, I didn’t reciprocate.  It’s not that I didn’t intend to, it was just that I was so busy... yeah, I was busy.

On the first of my many weekend visits home, (LSU is only about an hour or so from Metairie) who should I discover home, but Mom.  She had made up with Dad and moved back in.  I assumed Dad still had his French Quarter retreat, so I had to wonder how this was all going to work or if it would work at all.  Still I was happy that they were back together like they belonged.

I really enjoyed college life at LSU, the partying that is, and looking back, it was such a waste of resources.  I spent way too much time in a drunken stupor.  Still I managed not to flunk out.  If I had flunked out, the jungles of Vietnam would have been in store for me. 

I came home for winter break and to make a quick buck, resumed my life as a procurer of girls for Carl Rowan.  I knew Terri was home for the Christmas break or at least I presumed she was.  It wasn’t until she called me to take her to the bus station that I really gave it much thought.  By then it was too late.  Much too late.

That was some forty odd years ago.  Much of it has been forgotten, or at least filed away in the back of my mind, until I pulled out Terri’s Diaries and then it all came back in Technicolor.  I never heard from her again.

There were no entries from the time she left for OU until her last entry, dated December 26, 1967:

I can’t wait to get out of here, yet for some reason I wish I weren’t.  Later today, Terri Bradford will no longer exist.  I got ten bucks for Daddy’s slut bracelet. I should have taken it off years ago.  Better yet, it should have never been put on me in the first place. Well, I can’t do anything about that, but I can start as a new person.  Once on the bus I will be Honeysuckle.

Jimmy, if you actually read this (which I doubt) know that I loved you from the bottom of my heart.  But you must understand, to be reborn I need to leave the past in the past and that includes you, it includes your dad and it includes my sweet sister, Pepper. 

Love,

Terri

As I closed the last volume of Terri’s Diaries that Christmas, I knew that I had been a monumental heel.  In a moment of rationalization I thought, ‘If I only knew!  Why didn’t she tell me?’  I actually got angry with her for not telling me, but how could she?  How could she tell me about what her father was doing to her, using her as a fuck toy to satisfy his own sick perversions, exhibiting her and making her perform sex acts with and for the entertainment of his sick friends?  Hell, I did the same things with her!

When I had discovered the hickies that covered her tits that night, I had already passed her around myself to Carl and to Vito, so why was I so unreasonable about the hickies?  Because I thought she was dating and fucking someone else? Because I thought I might find someone better?    Because I was looking for someone fresh and new, another nice girl to despoil?  Because it gave me the convenient excuse to discard her?  I should have at least explored the possibility that she was the recent unwilling victim of some heinous attack.  Instead, I put it all on her and walked away.  I abandoned her and drove her into the clutches of Nick Melancon and his gang, as well as removing any check on her father that he might have still possessed.

I was so distressed that my parents picked up on it immediately.  Pressed for an answer, I angrily lashed out for them to leave me alone.  They did and left me alone in my room to sulk and wallow in my misery.  Rereading certain passages over and over, looking at the lurid photographs she had stashed inside the diary, I admitted to myself that I did love her, that I needed her and that all I wanted to do was take her in my arms and protect her like I should have done.   My epiphany was too late, she was gone.

EPILOGUE

When I got around to asking Dad about his relationship with Terri, he said, “Son, one man’s discard is another man’s treasure.  You weren’t treating her like you gave a shit about her.  What we did or what she did wasn’t any of your business.  I’ll tell you this, she’s a great fuck; very enthusiastic and remarkably uninhibited… but you already know that.”  I asked him several questions and he was quite upfront in his answers, but other than that, he didn’t volunteer any additional information.  When pressed about his silence he said, “Jimmy, I’ve told you this a hundred times, what you and some girl do is not the business of anyone else.”

More than forty years have passed since I last saw Terri. Through all these years, no one that I knew during those formative years has heard from Terri.  I did know that soon after she had left that her mother had moved; I had presumed back to somewhere in Oklahoma, but I really didn’t know for certain.   I knew they had moved because at Mardi Gras that year I called, looking for Terri’s little sister, Pepper, hoping she knew how to get in contact with Terri and also to see if she was busy.  (Okay, knowing what I knew then, I figured that maybe I could score with her.) 

I also tracked Julian down, thinking that he might know something.  Julian always struck me as little odd, but when I found him in his studio/gallery the man was downright freaky.  He wore a large cross around his neck and had a little shrine set up with candles and the Virgin Mary.  I guess he really was screwed up by those demonic people. He still had Terri sucking cocks on the gallery walls, but he had some new models, all wearing crosses.  One was a black woman with enormous boobs. He portrayed her with all these false teeth floating around her and biting at her tits… strange stuff.  Anyway, he said that Terri had shacked up with him and some of his friends for a week before Christmas, but that he hadn’t heard from her since.  I checked back over the next year or so, but he never heard from her again either.

I don’t know if Terri’s alive and well or if she is deceased.  She simply vanished when she got out of my old Chevy at the Greyhound station that afternoon after Christmas, leaving me her diaries and her previous life behind.

After reading and rereading her diaries, I felt pretty bad about how I treated her.  I didn’t understand and truth be told, I probably wouldn’t have understood.  How do you understand her relationship with her father?  As randy as my own dad was, I can’t imagine him doing that to my sister, not for any reason.  Still I felt that if I had known, things could have been different, but then again maybe not.

We could have made a go of it together.  We both genuinely liked each other, and yes, we loved one another. I simply wasn't mature enough to recognize a good thing when I had it.  It didn't matter to me that she was whore.  I eventually married a whore and I've been very happy with her.   I know it's not for everyone, but Dad was right about that; I get lots of strange pussy and she gets lots of strange cock.  No problems, just great sex and interesting sex.   I have Terri and Dad to thank for my attitude.

Terri darling, (or Honeysuckle if you prefer), I sincerely hope that you are well and are happy. If you’re out there and read this, please, please contact me.  I’d love to hear from you.  I really would.  Maybe we can get together and, uh… talk.



END of "Diary of a Teen Fuck-Toy"


Hope you enjoyed this Salacious Tail... Art Martin

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